This is what you need to know about me.
My Name is Jason.
I work on bicycles.
So please,Tell me one more time how you know more about my job than I do. Please, I beg you. Give me a reason to go full asshat on you. I'm not really a jerk, you just piss me off. I don't come down to the rocket surgery store and tell you where the flux capacitor goes, so get off my ass and let me do my job.
In a nut shell, I deal with the likes of you everyday, and from hence forth will be repeating your ridiculousness here. Not evey day as I got other shit to do, but when the mood strikes, you will hear about it.
Like the guy who brings me this jem.
"My 'pedals' won't turn..."
Yeah, this exploded in your bottom bracket shell.
"No, it's the pedals man!"
Okay. WTF do I know?
I'm not a rocket surgeon.